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Talking about erectile dysfunction

Recovery can start with a simple question. Millions of couples deal with this, and you can, too.

Talking to your partner about your ED

Talking to your partner about erectile dysfunction can be difficult. But taking a first step can lead to a shared journey. You may be surprised by what your partner is thinking.

Direct approach:

  • Can we talk about why we have stopped having sex?

  • There is something on my mind and I find it difficult to talk about.

  • The fact is, I haven’t been able to make love with you. I want to change that.

  • I know we have been distant lately. I think it is me. I am afraid to start anything in the bedroom in case I can’t finish. 

Casual approach:

  • Hey, can we talk about our sex life a bit?

  • I have trouble in bed sometimes. I’m afraid it might be erectile dysfunction.

  • It seems my medication has a specific side effect. Let’s call a doctor and see if there’s something else we can try.

  • I’m going to do something about erectile dysfunction and I want your help. 

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Download ED conversation starters

Talking to your partner who has ED

ED affects both of you and can result in frustration, anger and less intimacy. To show your support, get informed, choose your moment and let him know he is not alone.

Casual approach:

  • Honey, I love you and I am here to help with whatever is on your mind. Do you want to talk about it?

  • I love when we spend time together, and I like it best when you hold me. What can we do to get those moments back?

  • We have a great relationship and I enjoy being with you, but things haven’t been the same between us.

Direct approach:

  • I know sex may be hard to talk about, but we need to address the ED. There are treatment options available and I want to help.
  • There are a lot of couples that face this issue. I am here for you. We could talk to your doctor. What do you want to do?

  • We work hard on our relationship, so let’s work hard on overcoming erectile dysfunction.

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Download conversation starters for partners

Talking to an ED specialist

Talking to a urologist who specializes in erectile dysfunction treatment will help you find your best ED cure.

Casual approach:

  • Is it true that my health may affect my sexual performance?

  • I’ve had erectile dysfunction for years. Is there anything I can do about it?

  • I’d like to ask you about treatments to improve my sex life.

  • I am having problems with my erections. Can this be treated? 

  • What are the causes of ED?

Direct approach:

  • My sex life isn’t all that it could be. What can I do?

  • Are any of my medications ED causes?

  • Why am I having difficulty getting an erection?

  • Are there new ED treatment options for erectile dysfunction that I can try? 

  • Am I a candidate for an AMS penile implant?

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Download guide for talking to your doctor

96% of partners said sex with an AMS implant was satisfying.1

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Real stories

Hear how real people found their solution for ED.

Taking the next step

Once the issue is out in the open, you may be ready to talk about treatment. It’s helpful if both partners go to the doctor together. Ask questions about medications and procedures, talk about your symptoms and ask about the best treatment option for you.

We have several resources that can help you take the next step.


  1. Montorsi F, Rigatti P, Carmingnani G, et al. AMS three-piece inflatable implants for erectile dysfunction: a long-term multi-institution study in 200 consecutive patients. Eur Urol. 2000 Jan;37(1):50–5.